Doomsday device discovered under rock garden
JUJO BELL, Office Tyrant
99.99 minutes ago
The University of Alberta has buried a secret doomsday device under the new rock garden north of CCIS in an effort to boost the institution's international prestige,
The Getaway has learned.
U of A dumps failed Moodle for tween haven Nexopia
LEXMEISTER MIGZ, Tween Correspondent
0x002a minutes ago
The University of Alberta has announced it will be replacing its class management system Moodle with Nexopia next term in an effort to appeal to the burgeoning demographic of tweens.
Living wall lives up to its name in recent rampage on campus
LEXXXI PIGGY, Muppet-In-Chief
0b0100111 minutes ago
The living wall of the Tory-Business atrium is wreaking leafy havoc across campus after coming to life Tuesday to seek its revenge on those who have been "trimming its hedges" since September.
Arts faculty opens new shack
LANI WILLY, Hobo H8er
So very long ago...
The University of Alberta celebrated the opening of the first Faculty of Arts building in decades this past weekend with a ribbon cutting ceremony for the new Arts Shack, set up behind the crumbling remains of the Tory Building.
One final transmission from an old buddy
NONE OF THE ABOVE, Election Fugitive
Time to be movin' on
I haven't slept in days - such is the life of a man on the run. Before I die, I just want you to know the truth.
Actually, turns out I love kids
DICKY FAPCHAN, babysits my kids
Too soon?
Children are precious miracles from God. I can't wait to have kids of my own. Their inquisitive little minds come up with the most thought provoking questions, and they can really teach you a lot about yourself.
Israel is the greatest: a love letter to my future home
LYIN' THONGSGROVE
Over 9000 minutes ago
Boy howdy, do I love Israel. You know, besides that sticky mess with those refugees or whatever they are. But let us not get bogged down in depressing talk about who’s occupying who, and which people get to have a state. Instead, let’s take a moment to celebrate what makes Israel the greatest country on the planet.
